Holding each other up. 

This morning I wrote a post about being a strong woman. Someone commented and told me about how when she went to the gym today, in her locker, as well as the others, was a note that someone had slipped in saying 

‘Girls Compete with each other. Women empower one another # 

What a lovely thing to do! 

And it’s exactly right. As women we shouldn’t always be competing against each other, we should be supporting each other, holding each other up. 

We all have dreams, things we want to achieve and succeed at, but there’s room for all of us. Someone else’s achievement doesn’t take away from our own. 

There’s still so much judgement around, online and in real life, by women, aimed at women. Judgement about what we wear, what we write, how we parent, how we conduct our sex lives and personal lives, if you can think of it, you can be sure that someone is judging someone else. And it’s all just so unnecessary. 

Frankly, life is hard enough without us tearing each other down. 

When I wrote about being a strong woman this morning I left out an important point. A strong woman is one who supports others, helps them to succeed even if only by cheering them on. 

I have a circle of strong women around me. Women I’ve found on twitter, some I’ve come to know in real life,  and formed strong friendships with. All with different lives, each with their own complex story. 

We want different things, have (some) different values and different experiences but what we have in common is that we all want each other to succeed. 

As well as supporting me, cheering me on, being someone to talk to, they will also tell me when, actually I’m wrong. When I could do something differently, when I need to pull my socks up and crack on. But they do this constructively, with love because they want me to do better. Because they know that with encouragement I can and will do better. They offer me love, even when they are having difficult times of their own. And I try to do the same. 

They are my people. Who I look to, who I turn to. I want them to do well and they want the same for me. 

Find, and surround yourself with women like this. If someone isn’t by your side, holding you up, they aren’t your person. 

Find your people, be someone else’s person. 

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